"I'm BLACKER Than You!" - What Does That Even Mean?!

An actress decided to publicly choose the way she defined herself and what terminology she wanted applied to her...and the "black internet community" lost their ever-loving minds!

Seriously, some black folks completely lost their sh!t - if it weren't so frighteningly appalling, it would be hilarious. But, I digress...

I've been reading some of the commentary made by black men/black women about Raven-Simone and the way she self-identified during an interview with Oprah Winfrey. The multitude of varying opinions are amazing! Some thoughtful. Some ignorant. Some passionate. Some mired in that "crab in a barrel" mentality. Some positive. Some negative. Some racist. Some compassionate. The variety is endless.

I have come to the realization that this is a conversation our community needed to have - it is a requirement!

This is why it's struck such a cord among us. Many of us say, "I'm black and I'm proud!" but there are too many definitions within our community of what "black" means.

FUN FACT: No one person is BLACKER than another person because of how they define themselves!

For some, the definition of what it means to be a black person is so NARROW AND RESTRICTIVE that it doesn't allow us to become more than the color of our skin. Or more than the 'hood we were raised in. Or more than the hustle we engage in to "get by". Or more than the number of baby mamas/daddies we have. These self-definitions make "black" seem like a negative. We are only the stereotypes that have plagued us since slavery.

But, for others, the definition of what it means to be a black person is so BROAD AND FAR-REACHING that it's almost impossible to fit one type of personality/economic background/age group or community within the wide parameters of that definition: Therefore, we are only what we say we are - we are nerds. And geeks. And professionals. And entrepreneurs. And artists. And gays. And heterosexuals. Whatever! These self-definitions make "black" seem like a diverse and multifaceted community that is not easily defined...AND YET ALL OF IT IS STILL "BLACK PEOPLE"!

I have come to understand, that black people don't actually feel comfortable with a wide-range of diverse, multilayered self-definitions of what it means to be "black". We seem to prefer very simple (or simplified) definitions of what it means to be "black", almost like we don't want to think too hard or focus too much on what it really means to be a black person, in America, today. Being a black person in America today does not mean the same "thing" it meant in the past.

As I mentioned, it's good thing we're having this conversation! We don't have to agree with one another but this discussion will help us, as a community, to understand what WE mean when WE 'say', "I am black!" We can then define ourselves - not BE defined by old-world prejudices, stereotypes or the purposeful ignorance of folks who refuse to understand, empathize with or acknowledge our history, culture or communities. WE CAN DEFINE OURSELVES!!! No other input required.

As a community, we are finally beginning to conceptualize, verbalize and understand a simple fact - we can more than just "one thing". We are more than our American history. We are more than our African ancestry. We are more than a people with a history of slavery. We are more than all of the negative implications/ generalizations/ stereotypes/ characterizations that people like to attach to us (that we sometimes attach to ourselves)!

Guess what? We get to choose how we identify ourselves! As individuals. As a community. As a people. The wonderful part about this discussion is, - "nobody is wrong" - when it comes to self-definition! Nobody - even other black people - can tell someone who chooses to self-identify a certain way, what is right and what is wrong!

The simple truth is, whether you agree with Raven-Simone - or not -we needed this discussion! Remember, we can't move toward the future - if the ONLY THING we see is the past. We should NEVER forget our history but WE HAVE GOT TO STOP LIVING IN THE PAST.

Dear Black People: You are who you say you are, you are what your actions show you to be. Nobody can change that. Nobody can truly define you - but YOU!

Nankurunaisa.